


Ephesians 6:12

by orphan_account, tenaciouscorpse



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Anal Sex, Catholic Guilt, Childhood Friends, Demonic Possession, Demons, First Kiss, First Time, Friends to Lovers, Haunting, Jealousy, M/M, Minor Character Death, Possession, Rivalry, priest!JJ
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-10
Updated: 2017-12-18
Packaged: 2019-02-12 21:03:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12968379
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account, https://archiveofourown.org/users/tenaciouscorpse/pseuds/tenaciouscorpse
Summary: For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.





	1. Prologue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This fic is rated and tagged for future chapters. Enjoy~

Yuri sat up in bed when the gentle click of the closet door popping open jostled him from his dreams. He huddled beneath the thick quilt on his little bed, rubbing tiny fists over his sleep crusted eyes as he squinted into the night towards the source of the sound. It took a moment for his gaze to adjust, but finally a looming, unmistakably human form distinguished itself from the natural shadow. It looked like a man, he thought… “Dedushka?” The mumbled word did not match the figure, too tall and broad of shoulder to be his short, squat grandfather. Maybe… “Papochka?” He breathed his second guess with far too much hope in his tone, pupils blowing wide with excitement. His mother had told him that his father had to go away for business, which is why Yuri had never met him. But now that she was gone too, maybe he had come back for him! 

There was no response, but a name he had never heard before popped into his head. “Demyan?” he voiced aloud and though there was no confirmation from the figure aside from a nearly unnoticeable ripple in the darkness that formed it, Yuri knew he was correct. A soft puff of air pressed from his lips at the disappointment that this wasn’t his father, but he settled back down in his bed as he continued to gaze curiously across the room at the stranger, his trust so innocent in a way only a child could express. “I’m sleepy, Demyan.” 

Again there was no verbal response, but somewhere in the back of his mind, a separate consciousness prodded,  _ Go to sleep, angel. Sleepy angel. Pretty angel. I’ll be here when you wake.  _

\---

“Why are we doing this, Yuri?” JJ whined as he carried another scoop of mud from one side of his yard to the other, Otabek trailing close behind him with more. 

“We have to make pies for Demyan!” The blonde insisted as he snatched the bucket from JJ. He emptied it onto the flat stone he was calling his oven before handing it back, smushing the wet earth into a vaguely circular shape. He pushed this “pie” to the side before making another with Otabek’s haul. 

“Demyan eats mud? That’s  _ gross _ !” JJ threw down the bucket and snatched up a toy truck instead, “Come on, Beka, let’s play trucks while Yuri plays with his gross,  _ pretend _ friend.” 

The quietest of the three children didn’t even get a chance to speak before Yuri was on his feet and launching himself at JJ, small fingers grasping and pulling at strands of dark chocolate hair. 

“He’s not pretend! He’s right here!” Yuri hissed in his accented English that got him picked on relentlessly at school. He was a feral sight, teeth bared, fine gold hair a lion’s mane about his childishly round face, a state that had gotten him banned from playing with most of his classmates until he was left with JJ and Otabek as his only friends. Not that he cared or anything, he’d insist if his dedushka asked, Beka and JJ were the only cool kids at school anyways. 

Otabek wrapped his arms around Yuri’s torso to so gently pull the smallest boy off of the tallest, “Is Demyan still hungry, Yuri? Maybe we could play trucks for a while. My mom says if you eat too much, you get sick. Do you want him to get sick?” 

His voice soothed the beast, reducing Yuri’s fury to a mere pout. “No, I guess not. Can I play trucks now, Demyan?” The question was directed towards the tree, nothing there to the eyes of the other two boys. Finally Yuri looked back to his companions and flashed a gap toothed smile, JJ’s comment already forgiven and forgotten,  ”I don’t think he minds.” 

\---

“Yuratchka, who are you speaking to?” Nikolai called over his shoulder into the living room, trying to peek through the doorway at his young grandson without abandoning the meal he was preparing for them on the stove. 

“Just Demyan, Dedushka!” A sweet voice answered, but it did nothing to quell his mild concern. With a soft curse, he set his wooden spoon down and went to see for himself what was going on. But there was noone there. Yuri laid on his stomach on the threadbare rug before the TV, chin propped up on a ratty old tiger plush as he chattered away to thin air, “Dedushka says I look like my mom. She went away and couldn’t take me with her. Do you think I’ll see her again, Demyan?”

“Yuratchka?” Nikolai’s bushy brows knit together with worry as he stepped up beside his grandson, following his gaze to the corner of the room. There was nothing there, but an unearthly chill ran up his spine, making the hair on the back of his neck stand on end. “Come help me in the kitchen, boy,” he directed gruffly, clapping a protective hand on the tiny blonde’s shoulder as the child scrambled to his feet. 

\--- 

Nikolai made a point to go to church the sunday after Yuri first mentioned “Demyan.” He put on his sportcoat, a little thin in the elbows and tight in the shoulders, but good enough, and made Yuri comb his hair before they made the short walk, hand in hand, to their local place of worship. It  _ had _ been a while, he realized as he and his grandson were faced with more than a few judgmental stares, but this was where they needed to be. He felt silly for his nagging worry, but something hadn’t been right back home. A  _ presence _ seemed to lurk around Yuri, always looming over the precious child, making a distinct uneasiness settle deep in the pit of Nikolai’s stomach. He wasn’t usually one to believe in such things as ghosts and spirits, but whatever this was, maybe a quick chat with God would help. 

\--- 

Returning home from church, Yuri immediately became ill. They had hardly made it through the door before the child emptied his stomach on the laminate wood flooring.  _ It’s just a coincidence, everything is okay _ , Nikolai told himself again and again as he spoonfed the boy broth and eventually got him to sleep. 

A weary sigh pressed from his lips as he was finally able to settle onto the edge of his own bed to toe off his slippers, thinking back on the events of the past few days. Maybe calling a priest to come bless the house would be a good idea. It couldn’t hurt, at least. It was just too much adding up: the presence he felt, Yuri talking to someone who wasn’t there, and now becoming sick after attending church? It was too much to ignore. “I’ll call the priest tomorrow,” he murmured aloud as if to reassure himself that everything was going to be alright. He swung his legs up into the bed and under his quilt, reaching for the light on his nightstand when his bedroom window flew open, the shutter slamming into the wall behind it. 

_ Don’t!  _

His blood ran cold, hand frozen halfway to the lamp. It was the wind, just the wind, just the wind… he shut off his light and pulled his quilt up over his head, deciding to forget the voice not of his own that had shouted within his consciousness. Maybe calling a priest wasn’t the best idea.

\--- 

“Why are you so tired, Yuri?” Otabek asked gently as their little blonde friend drooped into his coloring book, jade eyes nearly hidden behind heavy lids. 

“Demyan wouldn’t let me sleep last night,” the child mumbled, trying to sit up straighter at JJ’s kitchen table where his mother had set them up with crayons, juice boxes, and ham sandwiches. There were terrible dark circles marring his cream skin, and he completely lacked every ounce of his usual fiery energy, “He kept opening my closet and pulling the blanket off my bed. I asked him to stop--”

“How could he do all that when  _ he isn’t real _ ?!” JJ snapped a green crayon in his little fist with his frustration, “Yuri, you have me and Beka, you don’t need a  _ pretend  _ friend!” He almost felt guilty at the deep, quivering frown that pulled down the corners of Yuri’s lips, but he was tired of hearing about  _ Demyan _ , resenting a make believe friend getting so much of the pretty blonde’s attention. “Stop talking about him, okay?” he grumbled, reaching for a different color to finish his picture. 

Otabek held his breath as he waited for tears or for the boy to leap across the table for JJ’s throat, but instead the blonde just nodded. 

“Okay… sorry.” JJ was never going to believe him, Yuri knew that, and even Otabek was starting to look a little exasperated when he brought Demyan up. There was no point telling them about him anymore if they weren’t even going to believe he was real. He promised himself to never bring Demyan up again… but he really did hope he would let him sleep soon. 

\--- 

“What in God’s name?!” Nikolai gasped when he entered Yuri’s room to wake the boy for school, “What happened to your face?”  

“My face?” Yuri sleepily mumbled, reaching a hand up to press his fingertips to his cheeks, “What’s wrong with my face, Dedushka?” 

The dark circles were getting worse, the old man noted, he still wasn’t sleeping… but worse still, five black streaks were present on each side of his face like someone had dipped their fingers in soot and ran them down his skin. He hurried to the bedside and brushed his thumb across one of the marks, breathing a sigh of relief that it did appear they could be washed off. There was no sign of where the strange markings could have come from, dread turning his belly. He drew his grandson to his chest in a desperate hug, grateful at least that he hadn’t been harmed by whatever did this to him. “Go get cleaned up, okay? Use a rag on your face. And dress warm today. I’ll be down in a moment to prepare your breakfast.”

Nikolai fetched a wooden cross that was hanging near his own bed and brought it to Yuri’s room, placing it on a nail by the window after the blonde had left for the bathroom. “Whatever you are tormenting this precious boy, leave my house! Your presence is unwelcome here! Begone from our home!” 

\---

After sending Yuri on his way to school, Nikolai set about straightening up the house. He cleaned their cups and plates, made his bed, then went to Yuri’s room to do the same. He came to an abrupt halt in the doorway, the scene that awaited him all but stopping his heart. The bedding was strewn about, the boy’s pillow ripped open, leaving a snowfall of feathers across the floor. The cross he had just hung by the window was knocked upside down and written beside it on the floral wallpaper in what appeared to be the same soot that had been on the child’s face was a single word.  **_No_ ** _. _


	2. Chapter 2

**Ten years later…**

“Whoever makes it around the track first gets to ask Yuri to prom,” JJ challenged as he reached down to touch his toes, stretching out his muscles before track practice.

Otabek shot up from his own stretch, brows furrowed skeptically as he wondered for a moment if he had misheard. “He doesn’t even want to go.”

“He would if one of us asked him to.”

“Can you _really_ see Yuri at prom? No, no,” Otabek held up a hand to silence JJ when he saw his mouth immediately opening to make some smartass remark, “Think about that image for a sec, Jean. Yuri… at prom.”

The taller runner’s slate blue eyes shifted to the bleachers where their topic of conversation lounged. Yuri had taken a passionate interest in the occult sometime after JJ and Otabek had left him behind in middle school, and ever since had had an affinity for drapey black clothing, long necklaces with crystal pendants, and perfectly round sunglasses. His witchy exterior was finished off with a deck of tarot cards in his lap and an umbrella in hand to shield his porcelain white skin from the beautiful, sunny day they were having. JJ smirked, okay maybe Otabek _did_ have a point, but the expression softened with affection when the blonde lifted his free hand in a wave. “Would he look out of place at prom? Yes. But you know as well as I do that if we sneak in a flask and pay the DJ to put on some Gene Loves Jezebel, he’ll have a great time.”

“...First one to make one full lap?”

JJ’s wolfish grin returned as he lifted his calf behind him in one last stretch. “Yep. Winner gets the exclusive right to ask Siouxsie Sioux to prom.”

“Pace yourselves!” Their coach yelled after them as they both took off down the dirt track at a full sprint, the older man whistling under his breath when they were out of earshot, “Shit, I’ve never seen them run like that.”

It was a close race the entire time, but on the back stretch, Otabek got a glimpse of Yuri’s otherworldly green eyes peeking curiously over the thick frames of his sunglasses, and it was the little bit of inspiration he needed to pull ahead, stumbling across the makeshift finishline a mere second or two before JJ.

He pumped his fist in the air and cheered in an uncharacteristic self-congratulatory moment, his eyes once again searching for Yuri’s. Unreasonable disappointment struck him when their beloved friend’s attention was occupied, reading the cards for a hesitantly curious cheerleader. He’d have to settle for gloating to Jean instead, turning to face the taller boy with a smirk tugging at his mouth. “ _Siouxsie Sioux_ is all mine.”

“Oh _come on_ !” JJ whined, placing his hands on his knees and dropping his head down as he tried to catch his breath, “That’s such bullshit, _you_ don’t want to go to prom!”

Otabek lifted a shoulder in a shrug, enjoying this rare opportunity to torment Jean. “Maybe we’ll just make out all night instead of going to the dance.”

“Dude!” JJ took a moment to draw in a deep breath before fashioning one of his most charming smiles on his face, “Come on, Beka. This is my senior year, it’s my last chance to take him to prom. You can take him next year. Be a bro.”

“You’re the one who suggested the race!”

“Yeah, but I didn’t think I’d lose!”

“Jesus fucking Christ, Jean. Don’t look at me like that. _Fine_ , you can ask him.”

“Thanks, dude! Hey, Yuri!” He took off towards the bleachers, leaping up the steps two and a time and making it to the shrouded blonde just as the cheerleader was leaving, the poor girl looking a little shaken. “Shit, what did you tell her?”

A sly smile curled full lips, and Yuri bobbed his narrow shoulders in a nonchalant shrug. “The cards simply showed her a look at her different options after graduation. It’s not my fault if she doesn’t like the reality that she’s pretty worthless. Shouldn’t you be practicing?”

“I wanted to ask you something first.” He plopped down onto the metal bench beside Yuri, heat suddenly creeping up the back of his neck and hands dampening as anxiety overtook him. Maybe he hadn’t thought this through very thoroughly. _What if he said no?!_

“...okay...?” Yuri quirked a brow, the thin arch revealing itself from behind his giant sunglasses.

JJ took a deep breath and faked one of his confident grins, taking a moment to muster his courage. “Would you do me the honor of going to prom with me, cutie?” He asked with a lot more boldness than he felt.

Yuri laughed, but a distinct pinkness flooded his cheeks, JJ suspected _not_ from the sun. His nerves melted away and he even went so far as to clasp Yuri’s hand between his own, bringing it to his lips to lay a kiss against his knuckles.

“What do you say?” JJ urged, “Could be fun, right?”

Yuri jerked his head down so his sunglasses would slip down the bridge of his nose, allowing him to see JJ more clearly, rosy lips pursing as he considered the proposition. “Yeah, why the hell not, let’s go to prom.”

—-

“What are you doing here?” JJ groaned when they entered the cheaply decorated gym only to immediately be faced with Otabek in a suit one size too big.

“You made prom sound so fun, I thought I’d check it out. You clean up alright, and you…” Otabek paused to really drink in the sight of Yuri. The blonde had dressed himself in skinny black slacks and an asymmetrical black blazer with a drapey charcoal blouse beneath. A single dangling purple crystal adorned his left ear, but most arresting of all was the way he had lined his eyes with black, the green of them practically glowing in the dim light, “Yeah, you’re not so bad either.”

“Gee, thanks,” Yuri rolled his eyes with a good natured smile, knowing he was adored. “Look, JJ got me a corsage like all the girls wear,” he held his dainty wrist out to show Otabek the flowers bound around it, cream roses and Queen Anne’s Lace so tremendously _Yuri_ that Otabek couldn’t help the pang of jealousy that shot through his gut, “It smells like a funeral home.”

Well, _that_ helped the jealousy some. “Way to go, Jean, funeral flowers. Nice.”

“Don’t tease him,” Yuri scolded, clinging to his date’s bicep, “I happen to _like_ funeral flowers.”

“Yeah, Beka, he _likes_ that kind of shit,” JJ winked, his hands slipping around Yuri’s slim waist and backing him up towards the dance floor. “Your date is making out with Sara, by the way,” he called back to Otabek as Yuri’s fingers bunched in the lapels of his tux jacket, skinny hips shimmying so deliciously close to his to a song he had never heard before. The tallest of the three flashed one more shit eating grin before turning his attention fully to his date, mirroring dance moves that definitely didn’t suit the uninspired hip hop song blaring over the blown-out speakers.

Otabek glanced back over his shoulder, swearing under his breath as he spotted Mila with her hands tangled in curled, dark hair. He resigned himself to a long night of watching his friends, wishing so desperately to be in JJ’s place.

JJ was almost surprised Yuri wanted to dance the whole time, thin arms flung around his neck, petite body swaying to music he hated but found fun anyways as they discreetly passed a flask of god-knows-what back and forth between them. As the night came to a close, the songs slowed and teenage bodies pressed closer together, heads full of hair spray stiff updos nestling onto tuxedo clad shoulders, palms growing sweaty as young men hoped they would get lucky in the backs of old beaters. “Thank you for tonight,” Yuri murmured in the space between them, tightening his arms around his date’s neck and smiling sweetly when JJ leaned down to press their foreheads together.

“There’s no one I’d rather be here with,” JJ admitted to his childhood friend, cheesy though the sentiment may have been. They swayed to some lame 90’s ballad, drifting closer until eventually Yuri was enveloped in his arms, beautiful head resting against his chest, right over his heart.

There was a heaviness in JJ’s chest, a painful knot he couldn’t ignore. He’d had tonight all planned out; he and Yuri would dance, pressed close together like this, then he’d get them a nice hotel room and have one last hurrah-- He’d make it special, magical for Yuri, a night he’d never forget. Yet that all seemed disingenuous now, with Yuri nestled so close to his turbid heart.

“Yuri,” JJ murmured. “I… I have to tell you something.”

Yuri looked up at him, eyes big and innocent and slightly hazy with alcohol and contentment. “Hm?”

JJ almost regretted beginning the conversation when that beautiful face was upturned towards him, he didn’t want this moment to end. But no, it wasn’t fair to Yuri to keep this from him any longer, there were mere weeks left in the school year. “After graduation, I’m joining the priesthood,” he blurted out, unintentionally holding his breath as he waited for a reaction.

Confusion was first to cross Yuri’s face, the tipsy blonde stopping their lazy swaying and taking a step back to get a better look at JJ’s face, wondering if maybe he was joking or he had misheard altogether. “You’re…?"

“I’m leaving the Sunday after graduation to attend seminary, Yuri. I’m going to become a priest.”

Hurt came next on delicate features, thin brows pulling together, full lips quivering as he tried to find the right words. “And you’re just now telling me?! What happened to going to college half an hour away? What happened… what happened to coming home on weekends to visit Beka and me?!” Tears swam in vibrant eyes, the alcohol making it more difficult to cope with this news.

“Yuri, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you. I wanted to tell you guys sooner, I just--”

“You just think it’s a good idea to throw your life away,” Yuri interjected. “JJ-- you’ve got a scholarship, a full ride to college, and you’re just giving it all up?”

“It’s not like that,” JJ replied, desperate to explain to Yuri why he needed to do this, how he was certain God was calling out to him, about the dream-- He reached out to try to draw Yuri to him again, only to have his hand swatted away. “Yuri, just let me explain. Don’t be like this, we can still have a good night.” For Yuri’s one step back, he took one forward, only to have small hands press to his chest to try to keep him at bay. Otabek must have been watching them because before JJ even knew what was happening, he shoved himself between them, shielding Yuri from him with his own body.

“Are you alright?” Otabek murmured to the blonde, his first priority, cupping his cheek in his hand, thumb swiping across his soft skin to wipe away his tears.

“Give me a cigarette.”

Otabek dug around in his pocket without further question and pressed the half empty pack into Yuri’s hands, Yuri tucking them into his jacket and storming away to slip out the door and into the night.

“Why do you encourage his shit habit?” JJ huffed, beginning to stalk after Yuri to try and salvage the evening, only to have his arm grabbed by strong, angry fingers. Otabek dragged him around the corner and slammed his back against the wall, fire burning in his narrowed eyes.

“You really think you have the right to criticize _me_ right now? What the fuck did you do to him, Jean?” He gave JJ a shake for good measure, not messing around when it came to Yuri.

“What did I _do_ to him? What the hell are you implying? Fuck off, Beka, he’s just being a pissy bitch.”

Otabek could have hit him for talking about Yuri that way, already bordering on irrational after having to watch the two of them dance so close together all night and being abandoned by his own date. “He ran out of prom crying and you had _nothing_ to do with that?”

“All I did was tell him that I’m going to seminary right after graduation and that pissed him off.”

“He was devastated, you ass, not _pissed off_. You’re becoming a fucking priest? And thought the best time to tell him was on prom night? For all those straight A’s and honors courses, you sure are an idiot.”

“Wanna try saying that again?” JJ puffed up as he drew to his full height, glaring down at the shorter boy, but Otabek stood his ground, not about to be cowed where the blonde was concerned.

“You don’t intimidate me, Jean. You’re so fucking selfish. You couldn’t let him have one good night, could you?” Otabek let go of the front of JJ’s jacket with one more small shove before turning to leave the way Yuri had.

“Where are you going?”

“To try to fix the damage you’ve done.”

JJ followed close behind, not about to let it look like Otabek cared more for Yuri than he did. Their argument and rivalry were forgotten, though, when they rounded the building to Otabek and Yuri’s usual spot by the outside janitor’s closet, but the blonde was nowhere in sight. “Is there somewhere else you two can get away with smoking?” JJ asked with a quirked brow, any animosity wiped from his tone and replaced with budding concern.

Otabek shook his head, a frown pulling down the corners of his lips as he glanced around the very small clearing on the edge of the woods, “No. This is where he’d be. Maybe he’s waiting at your car?”

They searched the area for nearly an hour, no sign of Yuri anywhere. They checked JJ’s car, then tried calling him only to see his phone light up from _within_ the vehicle. They went back inside, looked in all the bathrooms, walked the perimeter of the school, and he was nowhere to be found. JJ tossed his phone back and forth between his hands as he tried to convince Otabek it was time to get the police involved. The three of them were so close, they hardly did anything without letting the others know. They kept especially close track of Yuri. He was beautiful, sweet, and a little naive, so to have him suddenly go missing was beyond concerning.

“The police won’t care, Jean. I think he needs to be missing for twenty four hours before they’ll get involved.”

“Nikolai is going to fucking skin us alive if we don’t get Yuri back to him tonight…”

 _Us?_ Otabek started to open his mouth to point out that _he_ wasn’t Yuri’s date, _he_ wasn’t the one who promised Nikolai he’d have him home by midnight, but before he could get the words out, Yuri emerged from the woods to their left. “Yuri!” He called, tone composed of sheer relief, but the emotion didn’t make it to his face. Something was wrong, that was immediately apparent. Blonde hair was dishevelled, the cool jacket he had been wearing was gone, and he held his forearms up in front of his chest, parallel to his body. “Yuri?”

He hurried over to place his hands on Yuri’s shoulders to ground him, eyes sweeping him up and down. There were eyeliner infused tears dried on his cheeks, he was trembling from head to toe, but most alarmingly was the blood dripping from his arms. Up and down the lengths of them were criss cross, jagged gashes the likes of which he had never seen before.

“I don’t know what happened,” Yuri whimpered, collapsing against Otabek, caught in comforting arms and still holding his own awkwardly up to avoid dripping blood all over them.

“What do you mean you don’t know what happened?”

“I… I don’t _remember_ . I went outside to smoke, and then… then I was in the woods like _this_. I don’t… what... “

“Shhh, it’s okay.” Otabek drew Yuri closer, his free hand gently stroking his matted hair, mindful of the knots in it. He met JJ’s gaze over his head, finding his panic mirrored back at him.

“He’s drunk, dude. We had a flask. Maybe he just… fell in the bushes?” JJ whispered, not wanting to upset Yuri but his mind desperate for a logical explanation.

“What bushes would cause wounds like that?” Otabek hissed back.

“I’m not a damn botanist, I don’t know, but have you got a better idea of what could have happened?

He didn’t. It didn’t look like Yuri had been assaulted, all of his clothing except for his missing jacket was in tact, and he had no bruises or other wounds aside from the cuts. But at the same time, he couldn’t imagine what Yuri could have fallen on that would cause them. “Let’s just get him home.”

Together they brought Yuri back home, slipping JJ’s jacket over his shoulders to hide his arms in case Nikolai was still awake. They helped him bathe and settled him into his bed, one of them pressed to either side of him as they gently stroked his hair and reassured him that everything would be okay until eventually he fell asleep.

When Yuri woke in the morning, the wounds were gone.

\---

“I’ll miss you… _both_ of you,” JJ clarified with a lopsided smile as the three of them stood beside his packed car. Their separate love for Yuri might be stronger than the love they had for each other, but JJ and Otabek _did_ deeply care for one another, as hard as it was to admit at times. The three of them shared a special sort of bond, and to be breaking that now left them all a little uneasy and undeniably glum.

Yuri flung himself into his arms, and JJ rested his head on top of Yuri’s, pressing his eyes closed as he resolved to remember exactly how this felt. He and Otabek had both been in love with Yuri for ages, but he had always secretly hoped that he would be chosen in the end. Joining the priesthood dissolved that wish, it meant giving up any chance at a future with this beautiful boy, it meant never getting to hold him like this again, never getting to experience those perfect lips pressed to his. His eyes flickered open to find Otabek’s. “Take care of him, okay?” He disentangled himself from Yuri’s embrace or he was certain a few more moments of his soft warmth would convince him to change his mind. “I’ll see you guys later.”

He didn’t let the tears fall until he was on the highway. It was difficult to resist the urge to take the nearest exit and turn around, to go back, but instead he let the image of a dark hallway flood his mind. He’d had the dream several months ago, but it was as vivid as ever, a reminder of why he’d chosen this path for himself.

_Running, running through a hallway that kept stretching on, never ending-- He knew he was getting closer, though, he just had to run faster-- He was Jean-Jacques Leroy, the track star, he could do anything! The end was getting closer, and he could see a figure in the distance. Even without seeing him clearly, he knew it was Yuri._

_He grinned, running faster, but something was wrong. Something was moving around Yuri, like shadows peeling from the walls, closing in around him. “No!” JJ shouted, propelling himself forward-- he had to get to Yuri, had to save him-- The shadows surrounded Yuri, obscuring him from view, and when JJ finally reached the end he was nowhere to be found._

_Instead, he found himself looking at a crucifix, softly illuminated by a halo of warm light. He reached out to touch it, and he knew._

_He knew what he had to do._

**Author's Note:**

> You can find us both on tumblr!


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